#5 - Mars
Pimp:
#4 - Neptune
The original Ice Giant. Recognize.
#3 - Jupiter
Just a really big bastard of a planet.
#2 - Mercury
Once upon a time, the sun took a massive dump. That bowel movement is now known as Mercury.
#1 - Saturn
Isn't Saturn everyone's favorite planet?
Ned
#5 - Jupiter
Yeah it's freaking big, and has a big spot, but I remain unimpressed.
#4 - Mercury
Closest to the sun, and is basically a big lead ball. It's a fighter that never falls despite the millions of pieces of space crap that constantly rams into it.
#3 - Uranus
The coldest planet in the solar system, tilted on its ass, the ancients didn't know anything about it, it has rings, and a name that makes Mormons blush. Eat it Romney!
#2 - Venus
3 Words - "Giant Double Vortex"
#1 - Saturn
Bling Bling goes the Rings.
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